The Call
by Jellybean2200
Summary: Myka Bering just had surgery. She realizes who is important and who she hasn't told what's going on to. What is going to happen when she confesses her real problems and feelings to the one person she loves the most? Please Review!
1. Chapter 1

I woke up from surgery in a fog. I could feel people all around me and hear the monitors but I couldn't focus on any one thing. The pain was searing in my lower abdomen. I register a second later that I am screaming from the pain. I can't take it. There is so much of it. "What did they do to me?" I am yelling. Soon a nurse comes over and tells me it's going to be ok and gives me more of some painkiller I suppose. Another minute and I find myself sleeping again….

"_Myka" I hear a voice calling me. I'm in the Warehouse but have no idea how I got here. I follow the voice down a couple isles and see a perfect vision. There is H.G Wells, glowing with that beautiful smile on her face. "Myka I have been looking for you. I just wanted to see that adorable smile of yours again before I go." H.G says to me. _

_I become confused and it shows on my face. "Go? Go where Helena?" I ask her in a haste stepping to her more so I am only a foot away now. _

_Helena's hand finds the back of my head before she speaks again. "My dear sweet Myka. I am not going anywhere. But, darling, you may be. And I had to see you one last time before that happens." Her smile drops just a little and I know she is telling the truth. _

_My head is spinning. What is going on? How does H.G know what's going on with me? I didn't tell her…_

I open my eyes and shout "NO!" into the empty private hospital room I had been taken to while I was asleep. I am breathing heavy and I can tell that I am sweating as well. What is going on? Was that just a dream? It's seemed so real though. My breath catches in my throat as I realize that I never DID tell H.G that something was wrong with me…

Just then the nurse comes in to take vitals and give me some medications. "Ms. Bering I am Izzy. I'll be your nurse for the night. Can you rate your pain level for me please? Between a 1 and 10. Ten being the highest."

I look up at Izzy and she has a sweet face. I see a ten year pin on her badge with her name and picture. "It hurts. About a 7.5 right now. You can call me Myka if you would like as well." Trying to sit up doesn't go well and I yelp in pain because I can feel the sutures pull. "Excuse me Izzy?" I ask while her back is turned to me getting the pain medication ready for me. "Do you know where my belongings are? I would like to check my phone messages to see if work called."

Without turning around to me, Izzy walks to the chair on the fall wall under the window and grabs a clear bag. She brings it over and set's it next to me. "Here you go dear." She says to me before going back to her task of medications.

I start to look around and take in the darkened surroundings. It's kind of dismal to be honest. There is the one chair by the window, a flat screen that you have to squint to see up on the wall in front of the bed and then the curtain that shields the door from the bed and what I assume is a bathroom door in the corner. Under the television I notice that there is a "Today's Goals" board. On it has my doctor's name as well as the nurse and the techs names too. Number one goal is 'get pain under control' and the second is 'get out of bed'. Not really hard goals I suppose but with the amount of pain I am in from the surgery, I know it is not going to be easy.

Izzy turns to me now and busies herself with checking my saline bag to make sure the right amount is going in. "Do you know anything about what they found in my surgery?" I ask Izzy. I suspect she has seen and read my chart like she should have so this is an easy question.

Izzy looks down at me without a smile this time. "I haven't Ma'am. The doctor said he would be here bright and early to talk to you about everything and what's going to happen. You had a large dose of pain medicine down in recovery so he didn't want to wake you with this." She offers me. This actually doesn't make me feel any better. In fact, it makes me freak out a little. Suddenly my head is spinning and I feel light and heavy all at the same time. Oh crap…..Izzy pushed the pain meds already.

"_HAHAHAHAHAHA look at her! She is all alone and she is dying! What a pathetic human!" I hear a group of faceless people say. I have no idea where I am. Nothing looks like anything I have ever seen. It's not all white but it doesn't have trees and grass either. The group of people keep laughing loudly and pointing in my direction. "She didn't even tell her ONE! HAHAHAHAHAHA" _

_It's starting to look like somewhere now, like the street H.G lived on when we left her the last time. But what am I doing here? Why am I in front of her house? Still looking around and hearing the faceless group laugh and make fun of me, I am not sure where to go…_

_Suddenly I feel eyes on me. I turn around to see Pete standing there down the street a little ways. He is just looking at me so sad. I start to walk to him and the faceless group behind me stops laughing and fades away. It feels like it takes me a long while to get to Pete just standing there on his own. "Myka" Pete breathes when I get to him. "Myka, please. Lie to me. Don't leave me. You are my best friend. You're a sister to me, Myka. Tell me you aren't leaving me!" Pete looks like he is going to cry now._

_My heart drops in my chest as I tell him the truth. I can't lie to Pete. Not this late in the game. "Pete, truth is, I am not sure what is going on yet. Don't freak on me!" I tell him as I grab his shoulders to keep his attention. Next thing I know everything is fading…._

"Myka…..Myka. Wake up Myka. It's Dr. Carter. Can you hear me Myka?" A voice is drawing me from the dream state I was in. The light above my head is on and I have to squint when I open my eyes. I see three doctor's standing in my room now. "Hey Myka. These are my residents. They will be helping with your care while you are here with us. How are you feeling this morning? How is the pain? They told me it was bad last night after surgery."

I blink and get my focus straight before looking up at the doctor. "I guess I feel fine. A little hazy from last night and the pain seems like it's not as bad as last night. Do you know how long I will be in here?" I speak slowly because I am still drowsy. I blink a few more times and refocus on what the doctor says next.

"Well, we need to talk about that. It looks like the cancer has spread. We are going to be as aggressive as you want to be. And everything depends on how you want to handle it. We can start the chemo and radiation next week and set you up with everything you are going to need. But again it's up to you. I believe we can get as much of it as we can with this treatment plan." wastes no time in telling me the worst of it. My head starts to process what he said. But everything runs back to the faceless group telling me I am alone. I am going to die alone. How can that be? There are so many people around me that I love. Why does no one care?

"May I have the morning to look into some things?" was all I could get out of my mouth while my brain was going a mile a minute. I'm racing through the things I should do. What I should have prepared. If I have an updated will and power of attorney. IF I should tell everyone the truth about what is going on or just try to go on like normal. How is everyone going to react to what is going on. When should I even tell them? How do I even start to tell them what's wrong…

"I need to do a quick exam and I will let you take your time with this. It's a big decision so I don't take it lightly. If you have any questions feel free to have the nurse page one of us to come talk with you." Dr. Carter was being so nice about everything. I couldn't show him how scared I was. He did an small exam and made sure my sutures looks good and left me alone in the room.

My first thought came out of my mouth without me realizing it. "I need to find Helena." And I grabbed my cell phone and started making calls…..


	2. Problems pile up

Chapter 2

I must have fallen back asleep because I never reached my phone. I was awakened this time by another nurse; shift change must have happened while I was asleep. I can feel that the pain has gone down more now. I stare at the ceiling trying to understand what the doctor told me this morning. I know it's not going to be an easy road and I am not sure anyone would want to walk it with me. Pete is scared, and no one else knows. I guess it's time to start telling people how sick I am.

Without warning the nurse speaks and startles me. "Myka, how are you? I am Michelle. I will be your nurse for today. Can you rate your pain for me please?" Walking around and opening the curtain and checking my IV before I even answer her.

I take my time to assess my pain level. "It's at about a 6.5 right now. It's going down but I am still not sure I can sit all the way up yet," I explain to Michelle.

Stopping next to the bed and watching me try to sit up, Michelle puts a hand behind my back to help. "Would you like me to just raise the head of the bed up for you? Sometimes having the bed go up into the sitting position helps you without the pain getting worse," I hear Michelle say next to me as I wince from the pulling again.

I nod and start to lie back down. As Michelle raises the head of the bed up, I glance at the clock. If I was home right now, I would be at the Warehouse with Pete doing our normal routine. Sitting alone in a room isn't really something I have ever done like this before.

"I am going to go get your morning meds and pain medication for you. I will be right back," Michelle said to me when she was done helping me sit up.

As she walked out the door, I reached for my phone again. I wanted to try to make this call before the pain meds got here. H.G deserved the truth about what was going on; even if it doesn't affect her at all. I search my phone for her name and press the call button. Holding the phone to my ear, I hear no ring. Instead, there is a message saying this number has been disconnected. I press the end button and, out loud, I say "Shit. Damn it, Helena. Where are you!"

I scroll down and call Pete. "Hey, I have something I need you to do for me," I say quickly before he can ask how I am doing.

"Well, hello Myka. I'm fine, how did everything go yesterday?" Pete says mocking my quickness.

"Fine, Pete. I need a favor. Will you find the new number for H.G?" I ask him, hoping he is satisfied with my short answer about how I am.

There is a pause on the other line as Pete thinks about what I just asked him to do. "I thought you had her number? Wait…..what do you need it for? I thought she told us to stay away while she was trying to do whatever the hell it is she was doing with that man?"

Now I feel a little annoyance in my voice. Pete should know better than to even bring that up to me. "Pete, just do it. Stop asking questions and don't let anyone else know what you're doing for me, okay?"

I can hear Pete shift on the other end of the phone. I know I am asking a lot from him. He knows it as well. "Alright, Myka, I will do my best but you know I can't promise Claudia not finding out. I'll be quick." With that, he hung up the phone.

Michelle was back now with some ice water and medications. "These are your morning medications. Here is some water for you. I have to watch you take them if you don't mind." She seemed like she was just trying to do her job.

The water was so nice going down my throat. I didn't realize how thirsty I was until I had to ask for a second cup to actually take the pills with. After the second cup and pills were gone, Michelle informed me she was going to push my pain med now. I nodded and said no problem. Silly me, I didn't think they would make me so loopy and tired. From a distance, I could hear my phone ringing. Michelle handed it to me and I saw it was Pete calling. Crap.

I try to focus my eyes to answer the phone. "Helllo? HEEEY, Petey. Did you get the goods?" I hear myself say to Pete. Although I am not sure who is working my brain right now.

"Uh…..Myka are you okay? You sound funny," Pete replies. My head is starting to get drowsy now. I need to hurry this up.

I clear my throat and shake my head to try to clear the fog. "I'm fine. Did you get her number?" I am getting short with him now because I know I don't have long until I start to fall asleep.

I can hear the confusion in Pete's voice as he answers me. "Yeah, I got it. I know it's a working number as well beca-"

I cut him off before his long explanation. "Excuse me, Michelle? Can you do a favor for me please? My friend needs to give me a number but I am not sure I can write as this moment, can you take it for me please?" I ask Michelle as nice as I can right now.

She looks down at me and I can tell by the expression on her face that she knows the pain med is kicking in full force. I don't have long until I am back in the dream world. "Sure can sweetie."

I hand Michelle the phone and she explains to Pete that she is my nurse and is going to get the number for me.

That was the last thing I remember….

_It's all white now. Blinding. I feel eyes on me but I can't see anyone as I look around. I take a few steps forward and call out. Shielding my eyes, I try to look up; still seeing nothing, I take another couple steps forward like it will help the light die down. The light fades into something like a court room. I look around behind me and there are all of my friends. I can see Artie sitting all alone. Claudia and Steve are together in the row above Pete, who is sitting next to H.G. I fully turn around and smile at everyone. Then I realize that I am standing at a podium. Everyone I am looking at doesn't look as happy to see me as I am them. I turn around and everything starts to get blurry._

"_Myka Ophilia Bering, you are here today to explain to the people who care about you just why you aren't with them anymore. Tell them why you went through your illness alone." Above me, a woman who looked strangely like Mrs. Fredrick, was in what would be a judge's seat, towering over me with no expression on her face. A bang of the gavel in her hand snapped me out of my thoughts of fear and confusion. _

_I start to stutter when I try to speak. I am shaking and have no real explanation on why I never told anyone. I knew it wasn't like me to share problems like this. It was my problem to deal with. I've never really needed someone's help with taking care of myself. Turning back to everyone, I suddenly feel tears well in my eyes._

"_I'm sorry. I didn't tell any of you for reasons I can't explain. Artie, you are amazing. You are part of my happy place. I couldn't tell any of you really. Everyone one of you holds such a special place in my heart. If I lost you, I knew I wouldn't survive this." _ I awoke in a sweat this time with the sudden urge to vomit.

I didn't care what time it is, or where she is, I needed to talk to Helena. I need to hear her voice as soon as possible…..

I thought it was hard to tell Pete about my illness but telling H.G scared me more than I could imagine. While I was working up the nerve to call her, I paged the nurse and asked for my lunch or dinner. I am still having a hard time telling if it's night or day outside despite the clock on the wall. Going over things in my head and what I wanted to say to her while I waited for food was not helping me ether. I finally remembered that I had brought my tablet with me to read. I decided to get it out and try my best to write down what I wanted to tell Helena about what's going on with me.

I open the app I need to write notes and just stare at the blank page. My heart is telling me not to write everything down because then I will have some sort of expectation out of this confession. _'I have always been a strong woman around her. How can I show her myself in the weakest state I have ever been in?_ _I've always wanted to be strong for Helena. I love her.' _With my last thought, I knew exactly what I needed to say to H.G. There was no stopping me now. It could very well be the end and she needed to hear it out loud this time.

I put the tablet down on the chair beside the bed and fingered the paper with H.G.'s number on it. Just then, Michelle came in with my dinner and a fresh pitcher of ice water.

"How are you feeling after your long nap, Myka?" Michelle asked me as she set my tray down on the bed table in front of me.

With my eyes still on the paper in my hand, I said to her "I'm less tired. But still hurts to sit up like this. I hope food might make it better." I take my eyes off the paper and look up at Michelle. I can see she knows that I am not actually talking about the food. She can see that whoever this number belongs to means a great deal to me and that talking to that person is all that is going to help me.

"I am going to go grab your night pain meds because I can see you're in pain, sweetie. I'll be right back." Michelle watched me eye the paper for another couple seconds before she left.

'_It's time, Myka,´ _I thought to myself. '_Just pick up the phone and dial the number. Tell her you have cancer and might be dying. No big deal. Tell her everything. This is the only chance you may have.' _

My brain working a mile a minute, I pick up the phone from the table. I start to dial the number and, in that instant, everything I want to say makes its way to the front of my thoughts. Michelle walks in and starts fixing the syringe to my IV. I finish dialing the number and press send at the same time Michelle starts to push the medication into my system. The medication doesn't hit me right away, but on the third ring, I start to feel the wave of lightness come over me. I hadn't thought this through all the way.

On the sixth ring, I hear Helena's voice pick up on the other side of the phone. "Hello?"


	3. 3 Myka's Confession

**Note: This is in third person. I know it's shorter but I think I stopped at a good place. And I will be working on trying to get the next chapter done as soon as I can. We only have a few more. (sorry) I didn't intend for this to be a long fic, but I just couldn't even try to write it all in one chapter. It wouldn't be right. **

**So my sister HopeWasHere, you're one of the reason's I keep writing. To my AWESOME reviwers, thank you are amazing. I wouldn't write something so personal if it wasn't for the feedback I get. Amazes me every time. Please keep them coming. And don't be shy, let me have it! I can take it :)**

**That said...On with the story!**

* * *

Myka felt tears at the sound of Helena's voice. She was also starting to feel the effects of the pain meds taking ahold of her brain and body. After forcing her eyes to stay open so she could talk, a kind of squeak came out of her throat when she tried to speak. Myka cleared her throat and tried again. "Helena." was all that would escape. So laced with fear and want that Helena had to pull the phone away from her ear to look at it as if it was going to show her the look on Myka's face right then.

Helena puts the phone back to her ear and gathered her thoughts, trying to search for the right words to say back. Not knowing what was going on with Myka right now. She hadn't heard from Myka in months. Not since a week after leaving her in Boone. "Myka" is all that Helena could manage to say back right now. That's in her brain when she tried to ask what's going on.

Feeling the pull of the medication, Myka fights so hard to keep her eyes awake. "Helena, where are you. I need you." Unaware of exactly what she is saying. Her words slurring from the fog in her brain taking hold.

Helena's face goes white. The tone of Myka's voice, the way she said her name, it was all tainted with….want. Clearing her throat and blinking a few times to gather her thoughts before speaking so as to not give away her surprise. "Myka, what's going on, darling. What's happened?" Helena manages to keep it to an almost neutral tone with some worry laced in. Completely unaware of Myka being under the influence of pain medication.

Shaking her head to try and clear the building fog, trying to stay alert and talking to the woman on the other end of the phone. Myka suddenly had a vision in her head of Helena standing in front of her, and saying she hopes this isn't goodbye. The last time she saw Helena in person. Feeling the tears in her eyes at this memory, Myka chokes out. "Helena, don't let this be goodbye." meaning to say it in her head but saying it aloud instead.

Bewildered, Helena responds without thinking. "Myka, I would never say goodbye to you." Helena had no idea what was going on at the other end of the phone with her friend. Starting to worry now because something doesn't sound right with Myka.

"I couldn't stand it if you said goodbye Helena. Something burns in me when I'm with you. I get this feeling in the pit of my stomach and this ache. I look at you and my head swims. The way you read me but can't see that. I feel such longing to touch you when I am in bed. Dreaming of kissing you for so long now. Just to taste you on my lips. To rip your shirt off and push you down." Myka pauses. Watching all of this happen in her head, so vivid and life-like she can't speak for the feeling of arousal growing deep inside. Starting to breathe heavy now, Helena can hear the woman on the other end of the phone try to compose herself. "H.G, I need you. I need to feel you. Every part of you against me. I need to show you, really show you, what you mean to me. Who you are to me."

When Myka stops for a breath, Helena takes this as her turn to talk. "Myka, what are you saying?" Knowing in her mind she has thought the same things that Myka is saying to her. Hearing them aloud from the mouth she has memorized makes her heart beat faster. Causing her to breathe shallow from fear that she will say the wrong thing and cause the other woman to stop talking. Hearing something she didn't think she ever would, Helena's head is spinning.

"Helena, my body aches for you. I've never felt this before. Never felt such a deep love. Please." Myka is starting to run her words together now. Slurring still, blinking to stay awake. Suddenly she wrinkles her eye brows trying to decide if she wants to tell Helena everything. In her state of fog she doesn't realize she already has. It slips from her mouth before she thinks about what she's saying anyway, "Helena I'm in love with everything you are."

Helena's breath catches in her lungs. She can't breathe. _Oh_, _Myka_. It's all that her brain will allow her to think. This woman who has created amazing stuff out of thin air and wrote so many adventures can't say a word. When Helena finds her voice, it has a low growl to it that is so full of want Myka gasps. "Myka Ophelia Bering, where are you?"

Head fogged and swimming from Helena's last words Myka is unable to speak. Not remembering where she is. "Hmmmm, wouldn't you like to know?!" Myka says teasing in a sexy slurring voice. Smiling at the sound of a grunt on the other end of the phone.

"We need to talk in person. I'm going to find you." And with that Helena hung up the phone. Still bewildered at why Myka is acting like this. Slurring her words and such, it's almost like she is drunk.

Unable to keep her eyes open any longer, Myka presses the end button and lays her phone on the bed table next to her. Forgetting everything just said, she lays her head back and turns to her side trying not to wince from the small pain pulling at her stitches. Finally not in pain, Myka closes her eyes and drifts into her head.

Helena set's her phone down on the counter in front of her, standing in her kitchen alone, the house empty. Staring at her phone as if it is going to tell her magically where Myka is. Something is stopping her from comprehending exactly what Myka said to her a minute ago. Her mind was racing, trying to think of just how she is going to be able to find Myka. Helena's first thought was to call Pete and ask. Checking her contacts to see if she has Pete's number saved, she decided she has to call him. Pausing with her finger over the call button, she tries to think of what to actually say to Pete. It's not like she can call out of the blue and just demand to know where Myka is. Pressing the back button, Helena decides to text him first instead.

**Hi. It's H.G, how is everything going?**

Still unsure as to how this is going to go, Helena presses send. About a minute late her phone beeps to announce she has received a new text.

**I knew you would show up. I'm fine. But not everything is ok. Myka talk to you yet?**

Helena felt like it was planned now because Pete knew. A mild anger growing into her chest. Pushing it down, she replies to Pete.

**I got a call from her but we didn't talk long. Where is she? Whats going on, Pete?**

Helena knew that something was wrong by how long it took Pete to text her back.

About five minutes later Helena's phone beeps again.

**I can't say. H.G, she's in the hospital.**

A panic sets in to Helena's chest. Hospital? Staring at her phone reading the text a few more times to be sure she read it right, Helena finally types a response.

**I'll be there soon. **

Four words. Without thinking about it. Knowing exactly what she wanted to do. _Get to the hospital. Need to get to the hospital_, repeated over and over in her head, unable to keep the worry off her face. Grabbing her purse checking to make sure her wallet was in it and grabbing her keys before heading into the garage. Pressing the open button on the garage door, Helena also unlocked her Escape hybrid. Sliding into the driver's seat, taking her phone and putting it in the cell holder on the dash she had bought for long trips and making sure bluetooth was on. Turning the SUV on and sliding her seat belt on, Helena gripped the steering wheel and took a deep breath. She had never felt a deep fear like this before. Almost guiding her to move against her will.

She turned on the radio to distract her brain from thinking the worst as she backed out of the driveway and closed the garage behind her.

Putting in one of her favorite CD's Helena skipped to track four. "Our Love Affair" started up. This song always reminded her of Myka. Unknowing exactly the depth of love she had for the woman she worked with and would sacrifice herself for. Smiling to herself as she got on the interstate, Helena started to wonder just what was going on with Myka to put her in the hospital. Then she thought about why Myka hadn't told her something was wrong. Had Myka really not known how much she loved her? Did Myka think Helena didn't want to be told that she was hurt? Suddenly regretting the goodbye they shared a few months ago, Helena was on the verge of tears. Feeling her eyes threaten to spill over she shut them hard and breathed deep. Opening them again, Helena started to contemplate what she was going to say to Myka when she got there.

Myka awoke with a start, panting. The dream she just had about H.G seemed so real, she looked around hoping the door was shut and the nurse wasn't in her room. Laying her head back down Myka grazed her hand lightly across her stomach and felt the sensation of want already forming between her legs. Closing her eye and taking her hand away from her stomach, Myka wanted to smack herself in the head. That dream awoke something in her that hadn't been there in so long. Longing. Lust. Want. Everything she tried to tell herself she didn't feel for H.G after their last goodbye was coming back in full force now. Remembering that last hug, Myka remembered pulling back and just wanting to kiss those beautiful lips to show Helena just how much she felt she was wrong for wanting to leave the Warehouse like that. Myka brought her hand to touch her lips. Closing her eyes to imagine what it would be like to kiss those lips she had thought about so often. As Myka drifted off to sleep again, she was happy with the dream that came this time.

_Myka laid her head down on Helena's bare chest. Able to hear her heart beat start to slow. Helena put her arm around Myka to draw her closer. "Myka Bering," She said looking down into Myka's eyes, "I am completely in love with you."_

A tear escaped Myka's eye as she slept, dreaming about the woman she had fallen so completely for. Unknowing that Helena was on her way to the hospital to see her.


	4. Haven't Told Her

**I know this story is somewhat sad, but fear not my Bering and Wells lovers. This is going to turn out happy. Stick with me! I would love to hear what you think about everything so far! I am a sucker for feedback. leave me some!**  
This is for Hope. She is my rock when it comes to writing. She pushes me and I love it. Thank you so much sister. I couldn't have asked for a better addition to the family then u. :)

With that, onto the story!

**Myka's POV**

_Helena was standing in front of me, tears streaming down her face in a silent cry. I know she doesn't want me to leave. I don't want to leave her. To live this life we have built together for so many years. I set my band on the night stand next to her. "I'm sorry." is all that comes out of my mouth. I turn to go before the tears come, feeling the well in my throat as I walk the hall from our bedroom to the front door. How could I let this happen? The person who knows me better then I know myself. I felt us falling apart and didn't stop it. I didn't stop myself from falling out of love with her. What happened to my life?_

I awoke with tears streaming out of my eyes. I must have been crying in my sleep. I shut my eyes again and it all came flooding back. The dream, the look on Helena's face. The beautiful ring that I set down and left. The life I left. It all felt so...well so real. What happened? Fresh tears started now, and I went to move my hand to cover my eyes. But it felt heavy somehow and kind of wet. I hadn't made a sound yet, or moved. I was almost frozen in place from the dream I had just had. The tears were still coming and the room was blurry. There was a small light on behind the curtain that was pulled mostly shut next to the door. It wasn't much but as I looked down I could see everything. There she was. The woman who I had just walked away from in my dream. Dark hair was covering my arm and I realized her hand was holding mine. Helena's face was on top of our hands and... it felt like she was crying. H.G. Wells was crying at my bedside. The woman, who almost brought the world into an Ice Age, was crying. I had only seen her cry over Christina. It was a dizzying feeling to think she was actually crying over me. I was just, well, I was just me. Myka Bering, the one who stopped her from killing the world while having a gun pointed to my head.

Very quietly I lifted my other hand across my body and laid it on the top of her head. The tears were still falling silently from my eyes. I startled Helena. She lifted her head, but not too quick so my hand dropped down to her cheek. I saw that she indeed had been crying. From the looks of it, Helena had been crying for a while now. All I could do was smile at her. Helena was more than just an author, inventor, Warehouse agent and once a mother. Helena was a real woman. One that was scared but brave and determined at the same time. She was also the woman who chose to leave for a 'real' life.

My mind snapped back to reality, the smile faded. "How did you find me?" Those were the first words out of my mouth. I remember talking to Pete about getting her number. But I don't remember calling her at any point. I know Pete wouldn't tell Helena what was going on without asking me first.

Helena smiled a brief smile and pushed her face into my palm with shut eyes. I wiped the fresh tears that fell away with my thumb. "You called me Myka." Helena sighed.

I sucked in my bottom lip. Not to chew on but just to bite down on. I don't remember calling her. What did I say to get Helena here? To have her crying at my bedside. Did I tell her about how sick I am? I couldn't have. I didn't want anyone to know. Fresh tears started down my face again without consent. "Helena." I breathed out. It wasn't more than a whisper. Before I knew it I was wrapped in two arms crying into Helena's shoulder. And in turn, she was crying on mine. "I missed you H.G." I moved my head so I could smell Helena's amazing hair. Apples and just a hint of lavender from her body wash. It was pure heaven right now. I hugged tighter. It was all I could to do choke down the sob that threatened to come out. I didn't realize just how much I had missed her.

When we finally pulled apart I could see that Helena's tears had stopped and her beautiful face was still tear stained. I wiped it clean with the edge of my sheet.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to get here." Helena said to me. I had no idea what she was talking about, so I let her continue. "Everything was messed up after I had to hide with the astrolabe. The regents told me I couldn't talk to or see anyone from the Warehouse. I was given a new lease on a life that I didn't even know I wanted. But something was always missing. I tried to fill the whole with Nate. I thought Adelaide would fill the hole Christina left. It wasn't right."

I had a feeling that Helena was rambling because she was nervous about something. And to be talking to ME of all people about Nate really wasn't exactly the conversation I thought was going to come up right this minute. I was a tad bit annoyed but I didn't express as much. I just listened and let her go on.

Helena took a deep shaky breath. "Myka, do you really not remember calling me? Or anything you said to me?"

The look on Helena's face alone brought tears to my already cried out eyes. I had never cried this much before. Not even when Sam died. I mean sure I cried. I dwelled on how it was my fault that he was gone. But I never cried over him like this. I looked at Helena and broke. I started crying again. I fell onto her shoulder and sobbed. I weakly shook my head to tell her I didn't.

Just as Helena was about to respond there was a sharp knock on the door. I quickly composed myself and told whoever it was to come in.

"Good afternoon Myka. How are you feeling today?" Dr. Carter says as he walks to the end of my bed from the door. Seeing Helena he stops. "I'm sorry ma'am, but can I ask you to wait out in the hall while I talk to Miss Bering, please?"

Oh, that was the wrong thing to say. I think to myself as I watch Helena straighten up. "Absolutely not. I am not leaving this room for anything." Helena informed the Doctor with such a final tone he had to look at me for approval so as to not argue. I nodded my head to say yes.

"Very well then. Myka, I wanted to discuss the treatment options further. We have done all we can do this visit, but I would like you to come to the office and talk everything over. I'm going to give you a list of some of the treatment options now, and I would like for you to take some time and think about what you really want to do." Dr. Carter said to me as Helena squeezed my hand harder than I thought possible for someone who had no idea what was going on.

For this visit? "What do you mean for this visit? Are you sending me home soon? I asked with a tone of worry in my voice. Like sending me home was the worst thing in the world.

Dr. Carter looked from me to Helena and back again. "I am. Everything is looking much better. You're healing perfectly and I can send you home with some pain medications that will help until I see you in office. Does that sound like a plan to you?"

This time I squeezed Helena's hand back. I was actually happy to get out of this place, but at the same time I was about to freak out about what was going to happen next. What my options were. And if it even mattered in the long run if I fought with everything I had in me. Three days in the hospital just changed my whole life.

"Ok. When do you want to send me home, I'm going to need to let work know I can come back?" I looked at the Doctor and asked without a hint of fear in my voice.

I got a stern look back. "Myka, you can't go back to work yet. We need to take things slow. And your incision isn't even fully healed yet. We can talk about that when you come to my office next week ok?"

I let go of Helena's hand now. She had no idea what we were talking about. This I am sure of. I hadn't even told Pete what the doctor had said yet. I breathed deep "That's fine. Will they be setting up the appointment before discharge or do I need to call?" Hoping he took my words without the venom in them that I was trying to hide.

"They will have a print out for you with your appointments on it when you discharge. We caught this early Myka. It's a good thing. Just make sure you don't strain yourself before that incision heals because you could put yourself in a lot of pain ok?" Dr. Carter must have seen the tear stains on my face and thought I was crying about my diagnosis. He then, much to my surprise, turned to Helena. "Miss..."

"Wells." Helena said in a not so polite way.

"Miss Wells, I trust that you will see to it that Myka doesn't do more than she should, correct?" I almost gaped at the Doctor for treating me like a child right then. But Helena's response was perfect.

"Doctor, I shall see to it that Myka has the best care between now and her appointment with you. Don't worry." Helena grabbed my hand and placed a kiss on the back of it.

Dr. Carter gave a sly grin and decided she was telling the truth. "Thank you. I would like to send you home this evening if that is alright. Your pain level seems to have come down and you are eating well. It's just a matter of time and what you want to do. But we can discuss that once you have talked to family about everything."

I started to speak. To tell him that my family wasn't going to know what was going on. That my real family would for sure NEVER know. But before I could voice anyone that, Helena took charge.

"Well thank you Doctor. I am sure Myka and I will be researching ever possible treatment there is. And expect us well informed when we enter your office for the appointment." Helena's voice was loving and protective at the same time. She was using 'we'. Helena squeezed the hand she still held. Turned a smiled a bright smile to me. "I will take care of her."

Satisfied, Dr. Carter left.

Helena and I just stared at each other. The bright smile had not left her lips. Oh god, those lips. That smile. What am I doing! I couldn't keep my eyes from flickering from Helena's eyes to her mouth and back. Then her smile turned mischievous. I cocked my eye brow. And Helena looked away. Letting my hand go, she got up and started pacing in front of my bed. I knew this was going to be...awkward, to say the least. I braced myself for what was coming.

**Helena's POV**

Pacing. That was all I could do. Right now I couldn't look at Myka. All this talk of treatment plans and pain. Illness unseen that I didn't know about. How could she confess her love to me and not have told me she was sick?! Just keep pacing, Helena. The answer will come. How could this be happening?

I could feel Myka's eyes following me. I could just feel the expression she had on her face. Sullen. If Myka really didn't remember what she said to me, I didn't want to explain to her what she said. I am in love with everything you are. As her voice ran across my mind like a scrolling market sign, I stopped. I was directly in front of the bed now. Myka, now sitting up, was staring at me. I decided to go with the obvious questions first. I slowly turned and faced Myka with a look of worry I didn't know was on my face.

"Myka, please tell me what's going on." I guess that wasn't really a question. More of a statement yet not quite a demand. It felt good to say that to Myka first. Like if she told me the truth in response then a weight would be lifted from my shoulders.

Myka laid back against the pillows and sighed. Never taking her eyes off of me. "I didn't want anyone to know. Least of all you. I don't know how you found me. I wanted to do this in secret. Well, Pete knew. But he was the only one who was going to know. Hel-"

"Myka, you're avoiding the actual question. Please, tell me. I just agreed to take care of you, to help you. To make sure that nothing happens to you. But no one has told me what exactly what is wrong with you. I can take it. Just tell me." I cut Myka off talking faster than normal.

"I'm sorry Helena." Myka said quietly. Bowing her head to look at her hands.

I decided that standing over her from the end of the bed was probably not helping. I went around to the side of the bed that Myka's IV wasn't on and sat next to her and took her and in mine. "Myka, whatever it is. I am here. I'm not leaving."

She looked up at me with fresh tears in her eyes again. "Helena, I have...well I had to go in for the annual physical the Warehouse makes you do. And they found some lab work out of whack. So they made me come back for tests. And then they thought there was a mistake. But there wasn't." Myka paused to just look at me now. She must have been gauging if I really meant I wasn't going to leave. If I was to be trusted with this information.

"Tell me, darling. Whatever it is, I can do this with you." I said softly. This must have given Myka the push she needed.

Pulling my hand to her, she rested it in her lap, both hands around it. She wasn't looking at me, but down at our hands together. As she played with my hand she spoke in a whisper. "I have cancer. Ovarian. Its spread, and we are going to discuss what treatment to take on first."

I felt a tear fall from Myka's face to our hands in her lap. Myka's voice didn't crack. Nothing about what she was doing said she was crying. My heart dropped. Cancer?

I didn't say anything; I just took my hand out of hers and moved up the bed. I wrapped Myka in myself. I wanted to just will whatever illness it was in her body, out. Just poof, gone. I wanted to curse a God I didn't truly believe in for doing this to a wonderful, amazing, kind and perfect person. But none of that would help Myka right now. I just held on for dear life and rocked her a little as the tears came full force.

How was to even broach the subject of the phone call now? It honestly didn't matter right now. Myka was sick and I wasn't leaving her side.

When Myka quieted down a while later, I just couldn't let go. "Myka, I'm coming home."

"What?!" Myka's voice was raspy from the crying she just finished. She sat straight up out of my arms to look at me. "You can't come back here. Aren't you with that Nate guy anyway? I mean what about his daughter. I know she would miss you. And people would ask questions if you just show up out of the blue like that. I haven't told anyone but Pete and he's already more then I wanted to tell. I can't believe you think coming home is-"

So adorable. , rambling without really saying anything. I put my finger over her lips to shut her up. "Myka. Listen to me. I'm coming home. I left Nate a few weeks ago. After you left all those months ago, it just wasn't the same. My heart wasn't in it. So don't worry about that. And Adelaide is a wonderful girl, but I'm not her mother. I am coming back to where my home is. There is no argument." I realized I was rambling now and stopped.

My finger still on Myka's lips, she parted them a little and stuck out her tongue to lick me. "Hey!" I said pulling my finger away.

"Well, I do believe it's my turn to speak again. And your finger was in the way." Myka said with a light air to her voice. Then her tone changed. "How exactly would we explain your being back Helena? The fact that you were told to stay away. To have a real life. To not be here. Weren't you adamant on building a real life? You can't do that if you're here. Back at the Warehouse. Because I won't let you take care of me. I am not some sort of weak patient. I am a trained Secret Service agent, Helena."

Rambling again. This time I let her continue. I think she has a point, so I am racking my brain for a real reason I could come back and have it not be just for Myka.

"Besides, if someone was taking care of me then I would have to explain why. And it's bad enough I've missed three days because I was in the hospital. They can't know. They just can't know what's wrong!" Myka looked like she was going to start crying again.

This time it was me who puller her closer by her hands. I wrapped my arms around her. "Myka, shush. We will figure this out. No one has to know. I promise. No one but Pete, you and I." I started rubbing Myka's back with my hand. Up, down, back and forth. Circles. Her tears were dying down again.

"Helena, it's better if you go." Myka told me in a meek voice that sounded so foreign on her.

I pulled Myka back to be face to face with her. The tears in her eyes made them shine. But they were so sad. Scared. This was a new side of Myka I hadn't seen before. And it made my heart scream. "Hey, listen to me. I am not going anywhere. That's not going to happen." I said softly as I whipped the tears from Myka's cheeks.

I cupped her face with both of my hands so she couldn't look away. Pulling Myka in, I leaned up and kissed her forehead. "Myka, nothing is going to make me leave your side."

**Myka's POV**

Did H.G just kiss my forehead? What the hell is going on...? I pull out of Helena's hands with a confused look on my face. "Helena, why did you really come? Because I don't remember any call you're talking about. And I'm very confused."

Helena just looked at me. Almost dumbfounded. Like I said something she didn't understand. "You really don't remember. Any of it?" Helena said softly.

"Remember what? I called Pete to have him get me your number and that's it. I don't even remember getting your number! Did he call you? Because if he did..." I knew I was rambling. I just didn't fully know what was going on.

At this, Helena got up and went to stand in front of the bed again. Leaning her hands on the rail and eyes focused on me. "Myka you called me. I don't know how else to say it. Plain as day. You and I talked. You didn't tell me where you were. You didn't say much other than...Well it doesn't matter right now. We just talked. I texted Pete and I found you. That's all that matters. Now stop fighting me. I'm not leaving." Helena said in a sure voice.

"You have to leave! I don't need help with this. It's not like it matters that something is killing me right now. I face death every day at the Warehouse. This isn't any different!" I had a slightly raised voice now. I was irritated that Helena could just show back up and take charge like this. It wasn't her body. I wasn't hers in any way. And I felt like she was treating me almost, like a child that didn't know what she wanted in a candy store.

"Myka, this is very different." Helena softened her voice now. Almost pleading with me to understand why she was so upset. I still didn't understand how she could be upset when I was the one who was going to have to deal with this. "This isn't an artifact that you can slip in a bag and deactivate Myka. This is something far different. This is your life. And I don't want to leave it. I won't back down from this. You can't force me to leave. And I would just wait outside the door for you anyway. You mean more to me than you know Myka." A tear escaped her eye. Helena was a lot crying now.

I just stared at her. "What did I say in this...phone call I made to you?" I asked Helena slowly, watching her every emotion dance on her face as she pondered what to say.

Taking a deep breath, Helena just stared back. I could see she wanted to tell me. But I am not sure what exactly she wanted to tell me.

The door opened.

"Hi, I'm Janel. I'll be helping with your discharge this afternoon. I have some prescriptions here for you for the pain medications. And these are your after care instructions for the incision site. No submerging it in water for another week. Showers are fine as long as it's antibacterial soap on the wound. Any really bad pain, don't hesitate to call your doctor with concerns. Fever above a hundred and one, get to the emergency room. This is your copy of the discharge papers. First couple of pages are about help to quit smoking, and a list of places on the web that can help. We have to give it to every patient at discharge even if they are non-smokers." Janel stopped for a second seeing the look on my face. "I know Miss Bering. We hate it too. Lecturing patents on their bad habits isn't exactly fun. But, let's continue. These last few pages are your diagnosis, what they did while you were here and the last page is the appointments with the doctor we set up. Do you have any questions for me?"

I took the packet from Janel and started to look it over. Then H.G came over and slid it from my fingers. I turned a glare on her that I thought was going to get her to give me the papers back. But instead just kept going through the paperwork. As Helena got to the end, she flipped it shut and handed it back to me with a nod. Turing slowly back to Janel with an almost confused look this time. "Yeah, it's good. Do I need to sign anything?"

"Yeah, just my copy. Right here and here please." Janel informed me.

I signed the papers and Janel left telling me that she would be back in about a half hour to take out the IV and wheel me down to the car waiting area. I got up and rounded on Helena. "What the hell was that?! This has nothing to do with you Helena. You can't just snatch my papers out of my hand and read it over. It's not ok!"

"Myka, I told you. I'm not leaving. I am going to be here and I am going to help you. I don't care if it's ok or not. It's going to happen!" I could tell Helena was trying to keep her voice down so she didn't yell. Stepping out from the end of the bed to face me. About a foot away. "I don't care who else you tell. But I am not going to argue this with you. It's pointless. I've made up my mind and you're not changing it this time. No matter what you say. Now let's get your things together and figure out what hotel we are going to. End of discussion."

The tone in Helena's voice was so final that I didn't argue. All I could do was nod, a silent 'ok' to give into the woman standing before me.

I started to gather up the clothes bag I had brought with me. I took out the clean clothes I knew I would need and went into the bathroom to change.

Not much was said over the next half hour. Helena went down first to get the car ready. She booked a hotel a few miles away on the outskirts of town so people wouldn't really notice us. Everything was smooth getting out of the hospital and we stopped at one of my favorite restaurants to get take out. No one was fazed by H.G being back. Not like I was. Of course they didn't know her like I did either. Know what she tried to do. Understand that she left me. Helena left. She didn't leave just you. I wasn't sure what was going on in my head. After that dream I had and waking up to Helena crying at my bedside I was just confused really. I wanted to ask her about it again, but it seemed to be a touchy subject and I didn't want Helena mad behind the wheel.

Almost to the hotel, I got the nerve to talk. "I'm sorry."

Helena didn't look over or ask about what. Silently she just grabbed my hand from my lab and intertwined our fingers to give me a squeeze. She knew what I was apologizing for.

Pulling up to the hotel I let Helena's hand go. Getting out I thought that was it. We were going to check in and go to our separate rooms. I was mistaken. Helena rounded the passenger side as I was shutting my door. Without a word she grabbed my arm and pushed me back into the SUV. Both of her hands were on my shoulders. "Myka, stop. Stop acting like you don't know me. Stop acting like we aren't friends. Like I am not someone who matters to you. Please. Don't shut me out either."

I had the overwhelming urge to lean forward and kiss those lips that were pleading with me. Instead I swallowed hard and responded. "Helena, you do matter. But I didn't plan on letting anyone help me with this. It's not just you I hadn't told. Let's just go inside and eat. We can try to talk about this later. Okay?" I knew it was something she was going to accept for now. But she wouldn't last long on that explanation.

Helena nodded and took my hand again. Leading me into the hotel and up to check-in. Without letting go of my hand once, she signed us in and grabbed the key. Wait, one key? I didn't freeze but a slight panic set in my chest now. How was I supposed to stay in a room with Helena alone?

"Myka, it's ok. There are two beds. Stop worrying. I mean it. I'm not leaving your side." Helena whispered into my ear as we stepped onto the elevator. She must have sensed the tension I suddenly had.

Helena still hadn't let go of my hand. Squeezing every now and then to remind me she was there. As she let us into the room I untangle our hands to go set the food down on the table near the window. I started unpacking our pasta and setting it out. Looking around the room for the first time, it was beautiful. Not like a regular hotel either. But bright and yes, it did have two beds. I knew it was going to be hard sleeping in the same room with Helena now. We have done it before on missions but this was different. Something was different between us and I wasn't sure what. I watched as Helena made a phone call from the bed opposite me in hushed tones. I shrugged to myself and sat down to start in on my meal. I didn't realize how hungry I was until now. I was out of the fog of the pain medication and starting to feel like myself again. Only with an aching pain at the base of my stomach where my incision is.

Helena stood up and walked over to start her meal as well after she hung up her phone. As she sat down across from me I wanted to ask the obvious question but held my tongue. I knew she wouldn't actually tell anyone about my condition. One thing I always had a problem with was trusting Helena completely. Even with my life. We ate in silence until there was a knock at the door. It couldn't be.

**Helena's POV**

The knock wasn't a surprise to me. I called as asked him to come. But the look on Myka's face said her heart was about to pop out of her chest. I chuckled a little and got up to answer. "Hi Pete." I smiled and let Pete into the room.

At once Myka dropped her fork and ran to give him a huge hug. "Myks, it's ok. I'm right here." Pete said to Myka as she hugged him even tighter.

"Thanks Pete. But why ARE you here?" Myka asked with a raised eye brow as she let Pete go. I just went and sat on the edge of one of the beds to watch his reaction.

"H.G didn't tell you I was coming?" Pete asked Myka but then looked over to me. I shook my head. "Why wouldn't you tell her H.G?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise actually. Because no one is supposed to know I am here, and she doesn't want anyone to know what's going on." I said matter of factly. I knew I was going to be in trouble now.

Pete and Myka end their hug and both turn to look at me. Oh, this is going to be fun...

"Helena." Myka warned me before taking a step closer to me with her hands on her hips. "Explain. Now"

Put on the spot like that wasn't going to be easy. I had to think fast. If Myka really didn't remember the phone call I couldn't just use that as an excuse. "Well, you said Pete was the only other person who knew what was going on so I called him to bring you some clothes for now." I got up and tried to get out from under Myka's stare. "I just wanted to make sure you had clothes. That's all."

Myka eyed me. Skeptical. I was used to this by now. Myka had done that more than once to me. This time however it was Pete coming to my rescue. "Myka, it's not H.G's fault. You called me for her number so I just assumed you talked to her and asked her to come. So I asked her to keep me updated on everything since you weren't."

Pete's admission to Myka was taken better than expected, I thought. Then Myka turned to him and punched him in the shoulder. "What do you mean? I told you more then I told everyone else! Damnit Pete!" As Myka turned around to look out the window with one hand rubbing her forehead Pete and I exchanged looks. I didn't expect Myka to be so mad he was here.

"Myka, when I first talked to Pete about everything I didn't know you didn't want anyone to know about what is going on. I'm sorry." I offered as I stepped in Myka's direction. "It was just that phone call. It had me flustered and worried all at the same time. And I didn't know how to handle you telling me what you did. I honestly never thought I would hear it out loud after all this time!" I felt tears threatening to come out now. The reminder of that phone call out loud and Myka didn't even know what she had said to me.

"WHAT PHONE CALL!" Myka yelled at me. Frustrated about not remembering I suppose. As she turned on me to say more, I stopped her short.

"The one where you told me you love me! The one where you asked me not to leave. Not to let this be goodbye. The one you obviously DON'T REMEMBER!" I couldn't stop myself from saying it. Instead I just looked at Myka and felt, almost small. Like it wouldn't matter if she did know what she said. That she would never admit to it again. I turned and tried to walk to the bathroom but Pete caught me.

"Hey now. You can't just walk off after that. You need to tell her. Don't run away." Pete held me with both arms in front of him.

I know Pete is right. I know I should have told Myka the truth back in Boone before she left the last time. I should have told her so many times before that as well. Knowing this conversation may not end well; I still nod to Pete and turn back around. Drawing in a deep breath I just look at Myka to see her reaction to what I just said.

Her mouth was slightly open and I couldn't tell if Myka was scared or relieved. "So then it wasn't a dream?" Myka asked. It sounded like she was a kid again and woke up the next morning unable to believe she actually got what she wanted for Christmas.

That was all I needed. I stepped quickly over to Myka and wrapped her in my arms. "No, darling. It wasn't a dream." Now I could feel the tears starting. But they weren't sad tears this time. I was just so happy everything was out in the open. At least on Myka's side.

Pete didn't say a word. He set Myka's bag down on the bed and started to back out slowly. Never taking his eyes off of us. Myka saw him and pushed out of the hug and walked to him. "Thank you, Pete." Myka said before wrapping him in a hug so tight I could hear a breath escape Pete involuntarily.

"Awe, you're welcome Myks. Now I'm going to get out of here before someone calls to ask where I am. You two have fun. And call me tomorrow." Pete got out of the death grip that was Myka's hug and started for the door. "Oh, and don't do anything I wouldn't do." With a wink to Myka, he shut the door behind him.

We were now alone.

"Myka, I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm sorry." I said to the back of the woman that was everything to me.

"If it wasn't a dream. And I did tell you everything. How come you were so scared to tell me what I had said?" Myka asked while her back was still turned to me.

"I was worried you didn't mean it." I said. Without the crack in my voice Myka would have thought nothing was wrong. But I cracked and she turned around to face me. I lost it.

**Myka's POV**

I didn't fully remember the dream that I had about confessing to H.G everything I felt. Some part of me knew she wasn't lying about this. The look on her face told me she wasn't. Helena's face told me she was actually scared. "Helena, can we sit?" I asked her.

If I had apparently told Helena everything about how I feel, then why was I shaking? It must have been because Helena hadn't told me how she felt yet.

As we came together and sat on the end of one of the beds, Helena and I couldn't really look at each other. I stared down at my hands while H.G chose to stare out the window behind me. "Helena." I said softly. Getting the nerve I grabbed one of her hands and held it in mine. "H.G, I'm sorry. For the way everything came out today. I didn't mean to be mad at you for showing up like that."

Now looking directly at me Helena spoke. Her words very strong. "Myka, I don't care about that. You have every right to be mad at me. I just hope you won't hold it against me for long."

As I looked down at our hands together, like they belonged together. Helena's hand felt so right in mine. "I should have told you sooner." It was barely a whisper but loud enough that Helena could hear me.

"No, Myka. I shouldn't have been such a coward and told you first." Helena pulled my hand toward her and forced me into a gentle hug.

I let her hug me for a little while. It just felt nice. I didn't want to ruin the moment with talking. With spilling out all of my truth to the woman who has undone me more than once. Suddenly my brain registered what Helena had just said. Told you first... "Wait, what do you mean told me first?" I asked confused, pulling out of the hug.

Helena looked at me surprised. Like this wasn't something new. "Myka, we have been dancing around this for a long time. Don't tell me this is a surprise. Please."

It was hard to wrap my brain around the words H.G had just said. My heart however, began to beat faster. Knowing that she is right. All those looks. The small simple touches. The way she watched me cry in the woods when Pete wanted to destroy the Janus coin. That wasn't a friendly goodbye. That was a lover's goodbye. A goodbye that I never wanted to come. I accepted that I would just have to live with my feelings for Helena alone. She wanted a normal life. A life away from the Warehouse and I couldn't do that. I knew I wasn't really able to leave the Warehouse. Not even for the normal life H.G really wanted.

I didn't speak yet. I just turned my body forward towards the opposite wall and put my head down into my hands to ponder what Helena had just said. When I finally spoke up, I was worried Helena was going to change her mind about her last words. "I...I need to take my pills. Before it gets too late." Avoidance. Perfect.

I got up and went over to my hospital bag to get my pain medication. I pulled two pills out and grabbed my water from the table. After taking my meds, I started walking to the bathroom. "I'm going to take a shower. Think. We will try to talk again when I get out."

With that, I left H.G sitting on the bed alone. As I shut the door in the bathroom, I knew she could hear me. I slid down the back of the door and the tears came. Freely. Just me alone in the bathroom with my arms wrapped around my knees and my head down. I wasn't sure if they were happy or sad or even tears of relief. I just knew they were coming and hard. My world was just flipped off its axis. Helena was trying to tell me she was in love with me too. I should have just thrown my arms around her neck and kissed her hard. Instead I walked away to think and cry.

When the tears slowed, all I could do was keep whispering "I'm sorry."

The dark of the bathroom didn't answer back. But I could feel that Helena had come to the other side of the bathroom door and sat back to back with me. Just to feel her weight against the door made me feel the love we were both trying to admit.

With a few deep and shaky breaths, I tried to stop the tears fully but that was a lost cause. I finally got up and turned on the light. I knew I was a mess so I didn't even try to look in the mirror. Instead I went over to the shower and turned it on. As soon as it was warm enough, I got undressed and climbed in. I didn't stand though. I didn't have the energy for that. I just sat under the waterfall like I had against the back of the door. At least this way Helena wouldn't hear my tears anymore. The water had always helped me think, so this was what I was trying to do. Helena is the only person who knows me better then I know myself. The woman that I fell in love with on a mission she shouldn't have even been on. The woman I dream about when I'm alone. She loves me too. We are here. Actually saying it out loud. Something I never thought we would do. Why am I hiding from it? Why am I scared of what's outside that door? Love? Belonging? A sense of normalcy that I've never really had before? Is it because of what happened with Sam? I don't care anymore.

Twenty minutes later Helena knocked on the door. "Myka, are you ok in there?" Concern racked her voice.

Looking up from my sitting position on the tub floor, I had forgotten where I was. Shaken out of my head by the woman who I couldn't stop thinking about. "Yeah. I'll be out in a few Helena."

Still with a shaky voice because the tears never did stop.

After washing my hair and rinsing off, I felt a load better. As I was toweling off, I noticed in my haste to get out of the room, I forgot my bag in the other room. Crap. That means I have to go out there in a towel. And that's not going to be easy. CRAP!

"Helena, can you go sit at the table please?" I half asked, but almost yelled because I was freaking out.

"I can." Helena's answer was simple. No argument. No hint of surprise in her voice. Like she knew what I was thinking without me even having to explain.

I opened the door a crap and peeked out into the room. From my vantage point I could just make out a pair of legs in very nice tight black pants and knee high boots at the far side of the room in a seat next to the window. Good. I wrapped my towel around tighter and opened the door wider and stepped out. Holding the towel up with one hand I walked out to the bed. I bent over to pick up my bag off the floor. I quickly stood up when I realized that the towel wasn't long enough to cover my backside. My eye's almost bugged out of my head but Helena couldn't see my face. Instead she just got a nice view of my naked ass. You are just stepping in it today Myka. Great job. Suddenly I heard the chair push back and Helena was beside me.

"Here let me Myka." Helena told me as she bent down and picked up my bag. "It's a little heavy. Let me carry it into the bathroom for you. Wouldn't want that towel falling off." With a smirk, Helena turned around and took my bag into the bathroom.

This woman is going to be the end of me. I walked back to the bathroom with both hands holding my towel up this time. I had a feeling Helena would try something funny as a joke, but I wasn't taking a chance either way. I got dressed in peace. All I could manage was a plain tee shirt and boy shorts underwear. The medication was starting to kick in and after putting on my undies I thought pants would make me fall over.

Stepping out into the room the lights were off. The television was on and Helena was already changed into night clothes of her own. Well this isn't exactly the talking I had in mind...

I looked around the room. Our food was away in the small fridge under the television, and only one bed was turned down.

"Come here Myka." Helena forced out. I could tell she was nervous now.

Walking over to the bed to look at Helena as she was sitting up in the middle of the bed with one pillow behind her back. "Helena I'm not sleeping with you. Not tonight. We still need to talk."

Taken aback Helena almost looked offended. "Myka, I want nothing more than to simply let you lay with me while we talk. I would never do anything you didn't want me to. Ever. Please know that."

"Oh." I decided there was no harm in that. I got in bed next to her. Unsure of exactly what she meant by lay with her, I just sort of sat there. Looking like the dorky nerd I know I am.

"Myka, you can lay your head on my lap. I won't bite. Unless you want me too, anyway." Helena said, patting her thigh to show where I could lay my head.

Feeling the heaviness of my eyes, I wasn't going to argue right now. I slipped down and laid my head in Helena's lap. I put my arm across the beautifully toned legs stretched out in front of me. I sighed in content. Just happy to let everything out.

Helena spoke as she started lazy strokes through my hair. "The first time we met, you held a gun to my face. The look in your eyes was conflicted. I knew as soon as you rounded the corner though. I lost my train of thought and started rambling about meeting Nikola Tesla. I tried to regain my composure and be tough. I even kicked Pete in the head. But when you pointed that gun, I was done." By the time Helena finished, her voice still quiet, she had a cocky tone to it. Almost like it was a mission to get me to fall for her.

"I wasn't sure what I was going to do. Finding out that one of the greatest authors of all time was a woman AND standing in front of me. All of me just wanted to talk to you. About everything. At the same time I knew that Artie would have my ass if I let you go. That almost smug look you were giving me from behind Pete as you held the tesla to his chin; I thought it was a game to you. Training took over when you knocked Pete down. I didn't hesitate to draw my gun on you. No matter how I felt, I was still told you were dangerous." The soft stroke of Helena's hand through my hair calmed any worry I had. We were just talking. Like we had done so many times before. Maybe not exactly like this. More like from across beds as we were lying down. But this was soothing. I started to feel the veil of sleep dropping over me until Helena spoke again.

"You were never a game Myka. Getting you to trust me wasn't a game." Helena leaned forward so her head was above mine to whisper in my ear even though we were the only ones in the room. "I was smitten from the start Myka."

Feeling Helena's breath on my neck as she spoke sent a shiver of warmth down my body. Half rolling my body back I turned my head up to face her. "Really?" I gave her what I hoped was a cute smile.

Helena smiled down at me and wrapped her hand around the side of my face. "Yes, Myka."

Almost as soon as my name passed her lips she leaned down further and softly kissed me. The butterflies in my stomach became super-sized. I reached my hand up and behind Helena's head to pull her into me more. I was trying so hard to not let this moment go.

Helena pulled back before I could deepen the kiss. "Myka, you should sleep, darling." Stroking my hair again, I could feel the love in her voice this time. It really wasn't a game. Giving me a sweet smile, I didn't want to look away. "I'll be right here. Promise."

It's amazing how Helena can always sense how I am feeling. I nodded and gave her a small smile. Rolling back over I couldn't help but start to talk. I was just too happy not to. "When you showed up at the school and got to the medal before Claudia and me. After I released you and you gave us the medal. When you said I would of shot u already if I didn't believe u just a little. I knew then I was in trouble. It wasn't until you saved my life with the grappler of your own making that I was completely yours. Why do you think I let you help? I knew you weren't going away and I didn't' really want you to leave" I felt sleep dragging me down again. I started mumbling now. "Please don't leave."

"I never plan to leave you. Myka." One final time H.G leaned down to whisper in my ear. "I love you."

I buried my face into Helena's lap. Falling asleep, these were my last words to her. "I love you too."


	5. Consequence of Fears

__**Thanks to everyone for sticking with this story. It's going to get harder before it's better. But don't worry. I actually have 2 follow up fics to this one planned. So please stay and see how it all is going to end. (I figured we would need it if the last episode doesn't go right) **

**To Hope. I love ya kid ;) Best sister ever.**

**Please don't hate me at the end of the chapter. It was needed...**

_I'm being pulled down. No. Not pulled. Dragged. I try to scream but nothing comes out. Panic sets in. It's pitch black and I can feel hands around my ankles. Dragging me down to the depths of somewhere I have never wanted to go. Then I feel a falling sensation..._

"NO!" I wake with a start yelling. I can feel the sheen on sweat on my back. Everything has been kicked off the bed. And no one is here.

"Helena?" I call out tentatively.

Silence.

I can't of drempt all of yesterday. No. I know she was here. I am not in the hospital anymore. And I wasn't at the B and B either. I was at a hotel. A very nice hotel too...

"Helena?" I tried again. Still nothing. throwing the blanket off of me, I turned to get out of the bed. I heard the click of the key in the door. Instinct took over and I went to reach for my gun in the drawer. Duh, it's not there. It's back in your room at the B and B in it's own drawer.

I froze with my hand half pulling out of the drawer as I saw Helena come out of the small hallway that was between the door and main room. She was carrying a big bag with a slim box in it.

Helena was startled when I shut the drawer a little harder then I needed to. She looked up and around for a second like someone else was going to be in the room besides myself.

When she spotted me in between the beds giving her a look that almost said I was mad at her, a smile crossed her lips. "Myka, I was hoping you would still be asleep when I got back."

I straightened up and glared at H. if I should be mad she left me alone and didn't leave a note for me incase I HAD woken up, or happy she wasn't a figment of my pain medication induced imagination.

"What was so important you left, didn't wake me and didn't leave a note telling me?" I asked in a tone that told H.G I really was not pleased with her lack of thought about me.

"Well good morning to you as well, Love. I went out to buy us a laptop to use if thats alright." Helena looked taken aback by my sudden tone of displeasure.

"That was unnecessary. I could've just called Pete to bring mine from the house. I don't want you to spend money on me for nothing Helena." I started to the fridge to get my water out from the night before. I could feel a headache coming on from the way I woke up, as well as pain shooting through my abdomen above my incision. I turned around to grab my pills off the nightstand I looked at the clock for the first time today. In bright red LED numbers it read 11:22. I didn't realize I had slept so long. I was starting to feel a little guilty about the way I raised my voice a little to Helena now. It wasn't like it was really early in the morning. It was almost lunch time!

"Did you by chance bring any food back with you for lunch?" I asked sheepishly as I took out two pills and washed them down with some water.

Helena didn't say anything for a few minutes. She just let the question linger in the air as she started to take the new laptop out of the box and plug it in. While she was working on getting through the setup I stood behind her watching. Hoping that she was going to answer me about the lunch question because my pills needed to have food or I was going to vomit.

Deciding that I wasn't getting an answer unless Helena thought I wasn't mad about this morning I leaned down and put my arms around her shoulders and rested my chin on top of her head.

"Helena, I know you want to get this done. I really do need food. I wasn't just asking to change the subject. Without food my medication is going to make me sick. And that's not something I want anyone to see." I informed Helena as I perched on top of her head.

Without even turning around Helena spoke as she typed. "I shall call for room service then. The menu is on the table over there. Just tell me what you would like. No worries, darling."

As I sat down and started to look over the menu I began to wonder. But I pushed it to the back of my mind for now. I needed food because I could feel my stomach starting to turn. "If it's alright can I just have soup? It says they have Baked Potato. I don't think I can really eat anything too solid right now." I looked up and stopped talking as I didn't think H.G heard a word I just said. "Helena…...H.G!"

Jumping slightly from being shaken out of whatever stupor she was in looking at the computer, Helena looked around to me. "I'm sorry, Myka. I was reading something. Anyway darling, what was it you said?"

I lowered my eyelids and glared slightly at Helena. I was skeptical about what she was really doing because I couldn't see the computer screen from where I sat. "I asked if you could order me just a small bowl of Baked Potato soup. Solids aren't going well still. Even last nights dinner threatened to come up a few times. And a fresh water too please."

"Of course. I think I'll have a salad and hamburger. I didn't eat any breakfast. Didn't want to waste time with it." Helena was just talking out loud now as she got up and went to the phone to order our food.

As I watched Helena order our food, something hit me. It was always lingering at the back of my mind but it suddenly hit me full force now. What is Helena really doing here? I wanted to go over to the computer and see what she was reading about but it was too late. As I was in my head, Helena finished our orders and actually came over and squatted down in front of me.

"Where were you just now Myka?" I must of had a worried look on my face because Helena was concerned as she looked up at me.

I pulled out of my thoughts and looked down at Helena in front of me. "Can we not do this right now? I am going to lay down until the food comes, ok?" I gave her a weak smile to try and say I was ok for now. It didn't work.

"Myka, talk to me. Please?" H.G sounded almost pleading. I knew it couldn't be true though. Why would it matter to her what my worst fear right now? About knowing she wasn't here to stay, again, this time. Nothing was ever going to be permanent with her.

I took Helena's face in my hands. "Helena. Leave it for now. I promise we will talk. Right now I need to lay down, ok?"

With a small nod, Helena got up and moved aside to let me go back to the bed we shared last night. I had no idea what I was going to say. What I wanted to talk about. Who I wanted to talk about. Everything from the last couple years was weighing on me right now. The most heavy being the last time we saw each other and hugged goodbye.

"Helena can you hand me my phone? I want to make sure Pete is feeding Pete." I said out of the blue. I needed a distraction from my head and Helena was not going to work as she was the main thing I couldn't get out of my thoughts.

"Sure." Helena grabbed my phone from the table and brought it over to me. "Here you go, Love." With a smile, she handed me my phone and turned around. As she walked back she grabbed my calf and gave it a squeeze.

I wouldn't let myself stop to think about what she meant by that and instead pressed '2' on my phone speed dial to call answered on the third ring. "Hey, it's me"

"Myka! Shouldn't you be busy?" Pete said. I could hear his tone suggesting I had better things to do with my time then to call him. I rolled my eyes before I spoke. "Yes, Pete, I do. But I wanted to ask if you could feed Pete the ferret for me while I'm gone. I am not sure when I am going to be back."

I could hear Pete put the phone to his chest and say something to a woman who asked him a question in the background. "Hey, yeah Myks. I got it. Don't worry about Pete and you just work on being where you're at. I'll talk to you later."

Without even getting in a thank you and goodbye, Pete had hung up. I looked at the phone and just couldn't help myself. "Well goodbye to you too then." I said to the phone screen like I expected it to talk back to me. I could feel Helena give me a sideways look. I just didn't have the energy to bother with much more. I put my phone on the nightstand next to me and laid my head down.

I didn't realize I had dozed off until I heard a loud knock at the door and woke with a start. I watched as Helena went to the door and let the waiter bring our food in and set it on the table. She had cleared it off while I was sleeping from the look of it. As soon as the waiter left I got up and went to the table because it smelt amazing.

Helena sat down across from me. I wasn't really sure if I should bring up what was on my mind. Knowing that I wasn't even really sure if I wanted an answer to my questions anyway. After about five minutes of eating in silence, I decided it was better to get it over with then to be awkward around each other until she leaves.

"Helena, why are you really here?" It was a bad way to start but I wasn't sure I could handle coming right out and asking her about the one thing I needed to know about.

Helena looked up at me. Instantly I could tell she had been waiting for the more direct question I was reluctant to ask first. "I told you why I'm here Myka. For you."

"The last time I saw you, you were determined to make a family and a normal life away from the Warehouse. Thats my life. I can't change that. So if it's not what you say you want. Why are you here, really?" I couldn't keep the hurt from my words.

"Myka, what do you want me to say? Because you don't have to dance around it." Helena was almost defensive as she spoke.

I didn't say a word this time. She knew what I was asking. I knew she was lying the day before.

"He left me. About two months ago." Helena sighed heavily. Finally telling me the truth. "I told him who I really was, Myka. I didn't tell him about everything. Not about the Warehouse or my real past. But I told him my real name. Who I really was. And he didn't take it well…"

As Helena trailed off into thinking about everything, I was confused. Sad that someone left her because they couldn't see just how amazing H.G Wells really is, but at the same time, I knew it was what was going to happen. The way Nate freaked out when he found out Emily wasn't really Helena's real name. How quick he was to dismiss what he had right in front of him. How he didn't handle one crazy day in the life Helena never should've left.

"Oh." Was all that I could manage to get to escape my mouth. I knew I should say more. That I should comfort her in some way. However I knew the main reason she was with him and it was because of Adelaide. And I know there is nothing I could say that would change how she felt about everything. The loss of a potential second chance with a daughter.

We finished lunch in silence. Everything hanging in the air like a thick fog that didn't want to let up anytime soon. I decided to try and break everything in the air.

"Helena, can we lay down for a little while? I just want to lay down and not worry about everything for a little while." I asked Helena as she was clearing the table.

I was already sitting on the edge of the bed before Helena spoke. "I would like that very much right now."

Helena went to the opposite side of the bed without pulling the blanket down she slid on top. I slid in on the other side. This time everything was more natural. As if the night before had cleared the awkwardness we had about our feelings. Without questioning this time, Helena lay facing me as I lay facing her. Heads on the pillows and less then a foot between our lips.

"I'm sorry Nate didn't understand how amazing you truly are H.G." I know Helena better than I know myself most days. I decided to be cautious with my next question. "How did Adelaide handle everything?"

"Oh, Myka." Helena sighed. Taking her free hand and tucking a curl behind my ear. There was no smile, just the look of longing and pain. Not the same kind I've seen there before for Christina. But the kind that shows because of something missed out on. "Adelaide told me before I left that she knew who I was no matter what her father thought. Myka, she believed and didn't question. You are the only other person to have done that."

I couldn't smile at that. Instead, I pushed closer and took Helena in my arms. "I knew that little girl was special." I put my lips next to Helena's ear and spoke softly. "Nothing you do or have done will make me leave. Please know that."

I heard a soft sob come from Helena as I pushed her into me more. It felt like I was trying to take all the pain of losing someone who could have been another daughter away from her. I couldn't imagine just how much it hurt to lose Cristina. I wasn't sure if Helena was crying for Christina, Adelaide or herself. All I knew at that moment was that I wasn't going anywhere and I wasn't going to pry. If Helena really meant what she said last night, then we have a long time to talk about everything.

**Helena's POV**

Myka was wrapped around me when I awoke. We must have fallen asleep after we talked. Everything hit me harder than expected when I told Myka about what really happened with Nate and Adelaide. I knew it was dumb to be crying over someone elses child. But oh how she reminded me of my Christina. How bold, open to new things, and always willing to learn she was.

I slowly pulled myself out from under Myka, careful not to wake the beauty. Her curls had fallen over her face and she was just angelic. As I removed myself from the bed I thought about what I was reading earlier. Going to the table and pulling out the laptop again, I woke it from the sleep I put it into. I returned my attention to the website I was reading. It was all about the care and treatment for Ovarian cancer. I wasn't sure what stage or level Myka was in so I was just going to read it all. Research everything I could so I could be there and discuss everything with Myka and the doctors without sounding like a fool. I was reading about the surgery treatment option when I heard Myka stir behind me.

I didn't bother to shut the computer because I wanted to have Myka read and go over everything with me. As I got up and went back over to the bed, Myka was just waking up. I slid back in next to her. "Hey." I whispered.

Myka pushed her hair out of her face and looked up sleepily. "Hey." She whispered back smiling. I watched as Myka stretched and finally sat up next to me. "Listen, I'm sorry about everything Helena."

"Why are you apologizing Myka?" I asked with a sideways glance at the woman to my right.

Myka sighed and kept her head down looking at her hands in her lap. "I feel like I am the cause of this. If you hadn't of found an artifact, you never would have called me. Nate would never have ever known about what you used to do." Myka took her eyes away from her lap and turned to me now. "I won't say I'm not happy you're back right now. And I can't say I'm disappointed he left either. I just never wanted this to be how we started. If there was ever an 'us' at all."

It was my turn to look down at my hands. Taking my eyes away from Mykas was something very hard after what she just said. If there was ever going to be an 'us'. I hadn't given much thought to any other possibility. "Myka, I never meant to let us start like this either. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

I heard the shakiness in Mykas voice as she spoke this time. "Helena, I didn't tell anyone. I told you that. The only reason Pete had to know was because I was off my game after I found out. Everything just seems so messed up now. And you're here. And I have no idea what to do now. I never don't know what to do."

I took my arm and wrapped it around Myka's shoulder. I pulled her close. I knew she wasn't just talking about what's going to happen with us. She was worried. I couldn't stop her from worrying, but I could make sure she wasn't alone with everything. "Come sit with me at the computer. We can talk some more." I said trying to stop the flow of tears I felt at the thought of there not being anything I could really do.

"Sure." As Myka spoke, she nodded.

I slid off the bed and went back to the table and computer. I switched back to the page that had a list of treatment options. As Myka drew a chair next to mine I tried to think about how to start this conversation.

"What are you reading?" Myka asked, giving me an in into the subject without myself having to bring it up.

I stretched my hands over the keyboard in almost the way I had seen Claudia do before she started typing or hacking into something. I chance with a sideways glance at Myka now. She was squinting. "You don't have your contacts in do you?" I asked with an almost chuckle to my voice. It was so cute when Myka tried to read without her glasses.

"I uh…..no. I haven't put them in yet. But I think my glasses are around here. Give me a second." Myka said as she got up and went over to her night bag.

I had always liked to see Myka in her glasses. I didn't even have to imagine her reading one of my books in them. I had caught her a few times rereading her favorites while lounging around Leena's on our days off.

"Ok, so what are you reading?" Myka said with more confidence now that she could see the screen as she sat back in the chair she pulled over before.

I didn't try to hide anything really. I just didn't look over to Myka as I started to speak. "Well, I wanted to educate myself about your illness actually. So I am currently reading about the different treatment options and the different stages."

Myka didn't respond for a minute or so. I was worried I has said something she didn't want me to.

"I didn't ask you to do that Helena." Mykas voice was sure but I could hear the part of her that still didn't want me to know come through.

I knew she didn't. Myka also knew that when I didn't know about something I would always trying to learn everything about it. Ovarian cancer was something I had never faced before. "I know you didn't." I said sadly. I wasn't sure why it was sad to admit.

"Why would you do that? Why bother looking up what the odds are of me actually dying from this or living?" Mykas voice was shaking now.

I didn't know if she was worried about what I had learned or that she thought I couldn't handle the truth.

"Because you're important to me. I care so deeply about you and want every chance to see you have me through all of this." Now my voice started to shake. Did Myka not realize that I really do love her the way she loves me. That I couldn't stand to lose her as well?

"I haven't agreed to even let you stay here with me. To help me at all. I am used to doing things on my own, H.G. Don't worry about it." Myka almost barked at me. The second she was done speaking, Myka pushed out of her chair and went to rummage through her bag for something. I watched with great interest as Myka looked frustrated and mildly angry at the same time. Finally she came up with a piece of paper. Walking back to me now.

Myka shoved the piece of paper at me. "Here. If you think that this is all going to be easy and we are going to play 'house' together or whatever, why not take a look at what you're signing up for really."

I slowly reached up and took the paper from her. Without looking down, I just kept my eyes on Myka's. Hoping that she would get the feeling that I wasn't leaving. No matter what this piece of paper now in my hand said. The pain in Myka's eyes as I looked into them was almost more than I could bare. I knew right then that she didn't believe everything I had said to her.

I glanced down. What I now held in my hands was the future. It was going to be our greatest adventure together ever. Of course I was scared. I didn't know how everything would turn out. How we would pull each other through this. I didn't read anything when I looked down. So when I looked back and saw the tears in Mykas eyes I was almost confused. It didn't show on my face though. It was my turn now to stand up. Without letting the paper go, I grabbed Myka's wrist.

"Myka, listen to me. Whatever this piece of paper says doesn't change a thing. Please know that." I was looking directly at Myka. Straight in her eyes. Hoping beyond hope that she would understand that I am not lying.

Pulling her wrist away from me, Myka started to back away a little. "H.G you really have no idea what you are getting into. I'm going to be fighting a losing battle! You, of all the people I know, HATE losing a battle. Why would you want to be here to watch that?!"

I tried to walk closer to Myka, but every step I took she countered with one back to keep our distance. "Myka, I am not worried about fighting a battle with you." I couldn't help my voice getting louder now. "I would do anything for you Myka. Even help you through a battle that we have no idea what's going to happen."

"Helena" Myka whispered. " You haven't even looked at the diagnosis. I'm in stage IIA. I have a 67 percent chance of survival. I don't think you understand. That's only if it DOESN'T spread further than it already has! I don't know if I can have you around to see me go through hell like that."

I watched as a tear escaped Myka's eye. It pained me to see Myka hurting over this and not being able to comfort her. "Myka, I want nothing more than to be here for you during this. To be there for every doctor's appointment and discussion about treatment. I mean it Myka. Nothing is going to shake me or make me run from this."

This time more tears started falling from Myka's eyes. "If you aren't going to run away, maybe I should."

With that Myka turned around and put her stuff into her duffle and walked out of the room. Without a look back or a goodbye.

I was alone with a piece of paper and no idea what to do, knowing I couldn't go after her because it would make things worse.


End file.
